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I sprayed on Chanel Number Five perfume, gave myself the once over in the mirror before setting off on my mission. I entered the shopping centre where the twinkling lights reflected upon the shiny tiled floor, which looked like an accident waiting to happen, as I tottered over them in my three inch red stilettos. I had always been unsteady on my feet at the best of times and the fact that the shopping centre was teeming with people didn’t help matters at all. Why the fuck did people feel the need to do their Christmas so shopping early? I would have rather been asked to pour hot candle on my clitoris to be honest. In fact that was quite an appealing thought, I’d only ever had hot wax poured on my nipples and the guy had kept the mould of my nipples on his mantelpiece like some horny trophy for months. I walked across the centre until I reached the store where Andrew worked. I walked in and spotted Andrew folding up a pile of Fair Isle jumpers. He looked up and smiled when he saw. I will seek and find you.I shall take you to bed, and have my way with you.I will make you ache, shake & sweat until you moan & groan.I will make you beg for mercy, beg for me to stop.I will exhaust you to the point that you will be relievedwhen I’m finished with you.And, when I am finished, you will be weak for days.All my love,signed: The FluNow, stop thinking about sex, and go get your flu shot!----An air traffic control tower suddenly lost communication with a small twin engine aircraft!A moment later the tower land line rang and was answered by one of the employees!The passenger riding with the pilot who lost communications was on a cellular phone!He yelled, “Mayday, mayday! The pilot had an instant and fatal heart attack! I grabbed his cell phone out of his pocket and he had told me before we took off he had the tower on his speed dial memory! I am flying upside down at 18,000 feet and traveling at 180 mph! Mayday, mayday!”The employee in the tower immediately put him on speaker.
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